It’s been almost a month since i’d last written. The past month has
been quite a hazardous on in many ways. Was really physically exhausted
from Serve, mentally and emotionally exhausted from the blows from
different events n people, spiritually unresponsive because of
everything else that happened. It was a bad month, never felt so
attacked in every way before BUT…

I learnt so much.

One thing, i never felt alone through the whole process. Depressed and
exhausted, disappointed and discouraged yes but never alone. I felt so
carried by the Lord.  When i had no strength left, i really could
sense the Lord carrying me. When i had nothing left to give, God was
literally feeding me through the people around. Like Elijah.

Second thing, family and friends that are committed to pray are SO
impt. James has been the one that has been so patient with me and just
holding me along the way. The Sunday before i left for Serve Mission
Trip to KL, Abi also came around to pray for me and just to be with me
during service. After the service, an old man from the chinese service
sat next to me and gave me food! A stranger! After that, Angel prayed
for me again. I felt surrounded by the Lord and people who cared. 
Alice was looking for me and making sure i was ok too. God provided
manna and pillar of fire.

I almost didn’t make it for the Serve mission trip coz i wasn’t sure if
i could make it, people around were also unsure if i could make it. BUT
I really thank God that i went. The kids knew i was not well and was
still going along anyway. When i got there, i realised why the warfare
was so intense prior! The evil one just didn’t want me to keep on
going! He wanted me defeated and beaten back. Woah! No way! We had
intense prayer walks, preached the gospel, walk the talk, gave the
altar calls, gave the words, released God’s authority upon the church,
the city! The kids had intense opposition too but we pressed on because
we knew it was the right thing to do.

“Therefore, since through God’s mercy we have this ministry, we do not
lose heart…. For we do not preach ourselves, but Jesus Christ as
Lord, and ourselves are your servants for Jesus’ sake. … But we have
this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is
from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not
crushed; perplexed, but no in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned;
struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the
death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may be also revealed in our
body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for
Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So
then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away,
yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and
momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far
outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what
is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is
eternal.”

2 Cor 4

Praise the Lord! Strangely after i returned, i felt so refreshed and so
newly challenged by the Lord. I’m still learning to take a step at a
time with my eyes fixed on the Lord lest i stray and go my own way.
Sometimes it can be so unconscious and so subtle. The evil one prowls
and sometimes in my own weakness i fall into the temptation to take
things easy.

Please pray that i will remain alert and dependent on the Lord.

This entry was posted on Monday, March 7th, 2005 at 5:33 pm and is filed under Journal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.