Life’s been good
I decided to take a rest today… i find it
really hard to rest in Singapore. I feel confined into my little
apartment. It’s a wonderful apartment and i’ve got my stereo blasting
with Corrine May in the background. Her voice puts me in a melancholic
mode, prob the default ailing mode as James would say.
Did you know that i hardly smile in my childhood photos? I think i’ve
always been a serious person, very intense even when i was young. But i
love to laugh. Maybe i haven’t changed much. I’ve always been a SanMel.
A combination between a sanguine and melancholic. Which throws me at
both ends.
“Feel like a little girl, trying to conquer the whole wide world,
everyone wants a piece of me, donno where to start etc…” how apt.
I love to conquer the world. Not feeling discouraged because i can’t.
But actually feeling hopeful because I can. 
That’s so not me. Being
a melancholic, most times i’m pessimistic. But it’s only because of the
Lord that i choose to be optimistic.
I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me. I think in my heart
of hearts i know i’m made for more. Each one of us. That’s what keeps
me in youth ministry. Because i know we’re made for more. I want to
help people know that they can be more, only if they open up their
heart.
God open my eyes. God open my heart. My eyes get hurt seeing hurts. My
heart hurt experiencing pain. But God open my eyes. God open my heart.
It’s such a wonderful feeling to have dreams once again. To have a dream is to have hope.
“And hope [in God] does not disappoint us, because God has poured out
his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”
ex-christian murderer paul said