I usually write a "Dear Sophie" letter each month to Sophie but think I’m going to document her development this month coz she’s almost 3 1/2 years old!

ABCs & 123s
As you know Sophie doesn’t go to formal nursery even though she turns 4 this year and sometimes I worry how she’s going to catch up before she goes to Primary 1! In Singapore, she’ll have to be able to read and write pretty well in both English and Mandarin by P1. Most of what she knows she’s picked up at home or from watching videos e.g Letter Factory, Blues Clues etc…

As of now, she knows the sounds to the alphabets and she can tell what names of things begin with. She can even spell some of her friends’ names. She tried to spell "Oliver" on her own yesterday and she managed "Olv" which I thought was pretty good coz she sounded all the consonants all by herself! She tried "Agata" and ended up with "Ugt". Guess all her friend are going to get strange notes with their names spelt funny! She loves "writing" notes to her friends and they make absolutely no sense but she’ll just write a whole bunch of letters. One of the games we play is "letter box", we have two cardboard boxes that we use as letter boxes and she’ll write mail to me and I’ll write mail to her and we post things to each other. It’s a super fun Saturday thing to do. Most times she writes gibberish but she practices writing alphabets and I write real letters and she loves to hear me read them to her. It’s fun! Best thing about it? I can lie on the sofa in the morning while we do this and it’s pretty relaxing.

She can write most of the alphabets but there are some that she still stumbles over e.g. she gets her "b" and "d" mixed up and she writes "S" the other way around. Unfortunately I didn’t have a proper system of introducing the alphabets to her so she’s unable to recognise some of the lower case alphabets.

I haven’t been doing a lot with numbers with her. She can count stuff confidently up to 10 but sometimes she messes up. She’s starting to learn about addition from Blues Clues. We play cash register sometimes and we buy and sell things for fun so she gets to count "money". The "money" we use are just glass beads that we got from the good ole $2 shop. However, Sophie can’t really write numbers. 5, 8, 9 etc are just so hard to manage. Guess if we work at it a bit more, she’ll get it but we just haven’t really had time.

What about Mandarin? Er… no comment. We haven’t made much progress here at all. She only knows the names of animals and refuses to converse in Chinese. Sigh… help!!!!

Managing her emotions
I’m not exactly sure why but Sophie went through a phase a few weeks ago where she kept screaming when she didn’t like the way things were. When someone takes her toy, she’ll scream REALLY loudly. Or if someone hits her, she’ll scream REALLY loudly. When that happens, it just make me cringe. She used to whine or cry but she didn’t really scream. So when it started to happen, my first reaction was to curb it because it just didn’t go well with my upbringing. Kids are to be quiet! (Right?!?)

Anyways, two things happened, I realised that she’s really just defending herself and it really made the other kid stop. The other thing we did was to begin to teach her that she can say "I don’t like that. Pls stop it!" in a firm way and if the other kid didn’t stop, she had the option to tell an adult. Giving her the space to express her emotion and frustration plus giving her words to that helped. Whenever I stopped her from screaming immediately, it always made things worse because she must have been thinking it wasn’t her fault and she was just telling him "no!". Sophie has a very strong sense of justice and being unjust to her really got her mad (I can totally understand that). Well, I’m not sure if it’s all working but we are monitoring this. I’m really thankful that she has not much problems telling us how she feels e.g. I really miss Evan and Eli or I’m really angry. I find that spending 5-10 mins with her walking slowly from school to lunch really helps for us to connect and she shares everything that happens in school. Very precious times.

Language
It amuses me to watch how Sophie is interacting with adults. I remember when she first arrived in NZ, there was a time when she went over to the neighbours’ house and sat down next to my friend and ask her "How are you?". Yesterday I saw her attempting to join in my conversation with her teacher. We were talking about Christchurch and Sophie said "Gabriel, you know we went to Christchurch and we did this this and this…. ". I forgot what she said exactly but it was so cute watching her telling her teacher about her holiday. Like a big girl! She’s normally shy with strangers but if she knows the person, she wants to join in all the conversations!

Character
Sophie in relating to Evan seems a bit bossy. She keeps telling Evan what to do. A little worrying. However when she’s with Toby who’s a year older, she’s happy to just go along. When she’s face to face with another bossy kid her age e.g. Leanna, they just go head on with each other. Leanna is quite strong willed too. Amanda (Leanna’s mum) and I had to bear with the two girls irritating each other all the way to Rotorua from Matamata! 1 and a half hours! I guess Sophie is pretty headstrong when she knows she can be but she can follow as well.

She’s quite clownish in a lot of ways. Everything needs to be special and different to get her attention. She enjoys variety and loves to be different. Creative in many ways. Sometimes she really amuses us.

Very sensitive. She is sensitive as a person and also sensitive to others. If she ever sees me sad, she’ll come up immediately to comfort me. Quite a pastor at heart.

Relationships are very important to her. Spending time is definitely her primary love language. If Evan is not around, she REALLY misses her. She’ll tell everyone that she misses Evan and Eli. When they are away on holiday, she’ll make cards for them.

Gifts are important to her. I think that is her other love language. She can remember who gave her what. Today someone asked her about her sunglasses and she told them that godma and godpa gave it to her. That was almost a year ago!

Meal times
Sigh… community living always makes it SO hard for a 3 year old to sit still to eat their dinner. She’s improving in this area but sometimes it’s frustrating! She’s so kiwi now - she eats sandwiches for lunch! Yeeks! Lunch normally consists of a jam/peanut butter sandwich with a fruit. Ang moh to the core ah? She can eat 4 slices of bread on a good day. I comfort myself in making sure it’s grain bread. She’s more into pasta and noodles than rice. She loves stir fry veggies e.g. spinach. I was surprised that she loves bean sprouts! All the veggies that I loathe growing up! However we only have that on the weekends when I cook. Most days she’s just eating peas or corns. Ooo and she likes lamb! When I cook lamb, I almost have no chance to get to it. She also loves seafood… hmmm wonder who she got that from!?! Of course that’s also only weekend food.

Likes
Colour - Red (Hiak! Thank God not pink!). Actually if you ask her, she’ll say "red and black".
Toy - Toy watch and eye looker (don’t ask me what an eye looker is - it’s a plastic thingy that came with her bicycle. It’s not even part of the bicycle. She gave it the name. :)) She sleeps with both of them, plus her kitty and Windy. Both of which came free. Who needs expensive toys?!?
Video - Elmo, Blues Clues
Friends - Toby and Evan (Toby wants to marry Sophie!!! Faint…)
Clothes - Dresses, must be able to twirl, if not, not counted.
Anything thing of nature - sticks, leaves, twigs, stones, shells, flowers… my house is filled with these things!
Breakfast - cereal with milk, eggs, pancakes
Lunch - Bread with jam/peanut butter
Dinner - pasta, noodles, stir fry veggies
Fruit - pear, oranges, actually she’ll eat any fruit, even durian
Treat - jelly, gummies, san zha
Drink - babychino, Ribena
Activities - Listening to Winnie the Pooh audio stories, du shu (study)… ya she loves to do worksheets and sit down to study, crafts (painting, drawing etc), read, play pretend, watch TV, chit chat

Dislikes
Activities - Slides. She refuses to go on slides. She’ll climb, she’ll jump etc but she won’t go on slides. She’s not keen to sing in public.
Food - Carrots, broccoli, onions, tomatoes, lettuce
Clothes - She’s not keen on wearing pants/jeans, prefers skirts/dresses. And she prefers to go barefoot.

Dearest Sophie,

You’re going to be a che che in a few months! You’ve been really looking forward and talking about what you will do with your little sister/brother. You would like a little sister but we’re still not sure what baby is going to be. I do hope that you will get your wish. We all think that you’re going to be a great older sister and he/she is extremely blessed to have you as an older sister.

We love you dear one.

Love,

Mummy

Dearest Sophie,

Here’s you in Christchurch, NZ enjoying a fluffy (babycino - a cup of hot milk that is fluffed up and looks all grown up n fancy) at Robert Harris, living the life!

We really enjoy travelling and exploring with you little one. During this trip, we’ve really stretched your ability to just go with the flow - breakfast at 10, lunch at 3, nap at 6pm, dinner at 9pm…….. and to top it, bedtime at 12midnite after a movie in bed. Arghs!

Thank you for entertaining us with all your funny ideas and being the life of the family. We love you so much and we pray that joy will always bubble in you.

Love
Mummy

P/s: Sophie’s dropped her day nap a few weeks ago and is now sleeping 7.30pm - 7.30am. Instead of a nap, she has some quiet time on the bed. She finds that super exciting coz it’s something different. I take that opportunity to take a nap and she’s not allowed to disturb me! Ha! She tries lah, maybe for like 30 mins. However, we find that once a week or so, she still needs a day nap to get thru the day.

Dearest Sophie,

Happy 3 years and 3 months!

We love you little one!

Love
Mummy

Dearest Sophie,

Mummy almost forgot that you turned another month older! Good thing we’re still on Babycenter so we get monthly updates on your development!

You’re growing up so fast!

Last week, you accidentally cut your dress and you tried to get your way out of it by saying that Daddy did it which was untrue. When we tried to discipline you and asked you "Tell us the story of what really happened!", and you replied "Once upon a time…" Both Daddy and I burst out laughing! It was so funny coz you looked so serious! As hard as we try to be strict with you, sometimes it’s so hard coz you’re just so cute and funny.

We love you so much little one just the way you are and we’re praying God’s will be done in your life.

Love
Mummy

Sophie turns 3 today!

We had a party for her and invited all our friends from the school. It was a bit tight in the house but that’s what we love most, having a tight party! It kinda reminded us of our home back in Singapore and how we used to have parties and squeeze everyone in.

For the first time ever, I attempted to bake and make stuff for a party! Gin n I made muffins with Sophie and Evan yesterday. Turned out really well and so simple! I also made a jello "cake" using instant jello and made it look like an aquarium with gummies and marshmallows!

Sophie is at the age where she can help out in so many ways. She was quite happy packing all the goody bags for her friends. We put a pack of crisps, a gummy pack, a bubble bottle and a fruit bar. Turned out the bubble bottles were a hit! After dinner, the kids were running around blowing bubbles.

Oh yes! As of tonight, Sophie is now sleeping on a single bed on her own. We transited her from her travelling cot into the bed. Got her new girly bedsheets with flowers and butterflies. Big girl now!

Dearest Sophie,

You are turning 3 next month! Wow!

You’ve grown so much the past month! Now you want to do almost everything by yourself. Your song of the month is "I can do, there’s nothing to it, I can do it by myself!" (Barney soundtrack).

Here’s you with your new toys that Mama and Yeye sent you all the way from Singapore!

Happy 3 years old soooooooooon!

Love
Mummy

Dearest Sophie,

We’re back in Matamata. Most things are familiar to you and you’re settling in really well! Time is passing fast and you’re turning 3 in 2 months!

Happy 2 yrs and 10 months!

Love
Mummy

Sophie and her godbro, Chris having breakfast. She’ll do whatever he does. He’s 7.

Dearest Sophie,

You’ve really been enjoying yourself being back here in Singapore the past month. You’re enjoying your grandparents’ love and attention, loving the food and hanging out with your old friends.

Some things that you’re going through this season:-

You’re going thru this funny stage when you are quite reluctant to say hi or bye to strangers and even look at them but you generally warm up after a while. It’s generally hard to get you to do things that you don’t wanna do unless we spent time talking to you way before hand. Oh and you don’t like us to talk loudly or laugh loudly with our friends.

You are not fussy about the clothes you wear and will wear what I choose but………….. shoes……….. oh that’s a different matter altogether…… You love your shoes and so far, we noticed that you are able to match them to your clothes! Haha!

You really love animals and are very gentle with them. You love to cuddle them, touch them and feed them. I hope at some point we can have a dog although that will be a great breakthru for mummy. But daddy and I think you’ll do well with a doggy so you can read this a few years later and make a claim for it.

You love babies too. Every chance you have, you’ll want to cuddle or hold them.

You love to sing and here are some videos (1 Sophie Singing Jesus Loves The Little Children in 3 Languages, 2 Sophie Singing On the Streets of China) to remember that in the future. You make up songs to familiar tunes and are starting to tell stories!

Here is the first story you made up entirely on your own and told me (5th June) -

Kulios the bear, jump jump jump, on orange juice muddy puddles, went home to tell his mummy that he jumped on the puddles and thump thump thump. Mummy said you can jump on the puddles.

So cute lah! It probably all started in Vanuatu when you got tired of listening to Jesus Loves Me before you sleep and started asking for songs about coconuts and flowers and Daddy and I had to make up songs and stories.

You are also starting to imitate our long prayers. Here’s your longest one on your own thus far (this is roughly what you said, not word for word): -

Dear Jesus, I pray for Auntie Wan Lin. Protect her. Please bless her. When she is in matamata. Help her. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen.

We’re praying that the Lord will raise you up to be a mighty prayer warrior. Remember that the Lord listens to you and He will answer your prayers and talk to you.

Learning wise, Mummy hasn’t spent much time teaching you your ABCs and 123s in the past few months but we’ve no doubt you’ll catch up. You can’t really recognise the alphabets at this point. You are able to count up to about 6 things now but struggle to recognise the numbers. Funny to hear you negotiating with us when we say "Only 2." and you say "3?". Oooo your conversational Mandarin has improved leaps and bounds since we’ve been to China! You’re able to speak in sentences now. Very simple but we’re very happy about that. You’ve got a good grip on the pencil and I think you are able to some tracing soon. So fun!

It’s been great fun growing with you and teaching you about life. Our prayer is that you will grow to love people and learn to serve and care for them as your heavenly Father does. May the Lord widen your heart little one.

Love
Mummy

Dearest Sophie,

I can’t believe that you’re almost three!

Mummy was observing you on the plane on the way back to Singapore from Auckland and you seemed to have become such a big girl all of a sudden. You were wearing jeans, sitting upright in your own seat, one knee up resting against the table, earphones on, watching the TV show of your choice…. amazing. Pity I forgot to snap a picture.

Happy turning one month older sweets! We love you so much!

Love
Mummy

Dearest Sophie,

Oh our little darling girl. Someone commented that you are like a little 2 year old turning 10. It’s amazing to see how much you grow each month, not just physically but emotionally, spiritually and intellectually.

We’ve just arrived in Vanuatu a week ago and it seems like you’ve settled in pretty well. You are eating well, actually much better than back in NZ, maybe coz the food is similar to what you get back in Singapore e.g rice/root vegetables with dishes plus lotsa fruits. You are sleeping relatively ok, sometimes you get up in the night either with a nightmare or sometimes you are just feeling itchy. It’s been really hot and it’s so hard to keep you clean all the time. But still, we are really proud of how you are adjusting.

We have been really tickled at how you are picking up the Bislama language and making the locals laugh at your attempts to speak it and also how you are willing to sit in the pram which happens to be in a terrible condition and be dragged in it over potholes and mud.

Oh it’s really so hard to keep you clean and prim and proper in the village but thank you for showing us how to live and be content in every situation.

Thank you for being our wonderful little girl and thank you for being so loving and willing to share (ok at least 50% of the time, hiak!) with the little ones around. We are so proud of you and we love you no matter what!

Love
Mommy

Dearest Sophie,

Precious little one, you are growing so fast that soon we don’t have to count your age by months but by years!

The past month you’ve started to make more sense in your scribbles and sketches and we are starting to realise that you are very creative and very good with your hands (just like Daddy!). It’s so exciting to see that development coz it’s really entertaining to hear your thoughts that go on in that little big head of yours.

You are not singing as much as you used to, maybe because I’m not home with you that much these days but still you will sing our conversations and make up tunes. I love it when you do that! It’s so cute and funny!

Your fav thing to do these few days is spending lots of time at the sand pit. You’ll hang around with the bigger boys as they dig trenches and build sandcastles. It’s so nice to see them being so sweet and gentle with you. Even when you get in their way, they just lift you up and put you somewhere else without being mean about it. It’s great that you are learning to play with different kids of different ages. Sometimes some are quite mean to you but it’s part of growing up and you’ve been pretty forgiving most times.

It’s cool to see how you are becoming more kiwi, ok, maybe not so cool to your grandparents BUT…. you are enjoying the outdoors so much! And you are happily walking around barefoot and have mastered most of the slopes and stairs around the compound. Hiak! Ok but at least no slang. Still talking like a Singaporean, like us. But you’ve picked up some Swedish.

This is a real precious time and I pray that it will have a significant impact on your life. Keep on growing!

Love lots
Mummy