This song has been ringing in my head.

As i come into your presence
Past the gates of praise
Into your sanctuary
Till we’re standing face to face
I look upon your countenance
I see the fullness of your grace
And i can only bow down and say

You are awesome in this place Mighty God
You are awesome in this place Abba Father
You are worthy of all praise
To you our lives we raise
You are awesome in this place Mighty God

The past few days have been wonderful. The Lord has really led us into some unusual business as E reminded me today.

First of all, a prayer and miracle was answered. On Thurs, James n i
prayed that God will put us at the right place to minister to people
and during serve small group yesterday, that’s what happened. Prayed
with a girl and the Lord answered her prayer!

Second of all, another prayer was answered today. James and i wanted to
start a small group but some of our leaders were not in full approval
until the Lord showed us more. So today, as i was sharing w E, she felt
that that’s what the Lord’s been asking her to do to! To start a grp! And we
share the same heart to reach the broken n lost. It’s really God’s
timing coz i’m almost at the verge of letting it go already.

WOW i guess i’ve got little faith. I didn’t expect things to happen so
fast after we prayed that prayer on new yr’s eve to expect unusual
business and not business as usual.

Exciting.

Beautiful sunrise that actually got me out of bed at Bintan on 18th July 6am on a holiday!

Isaiah 62

reminding me that the Lord will not let me go until righteousness shine out like the dawn….

As i was spending time with God and praying this morning, i just felt i need to share this.

About the cluster retreat, i really wasn’t that keen on having it. I
was really tempted to just forget it about it coz none of the leaders
were able to help out and the older ones were going to have major exams
this year and time was running out for preparation. But yet somehow
deep in my heart, i knew that God wanted to have it and somehow felt
that God was saying that I want to speak to my people, i want to bless
them and they need me.

So just 2 weeks before the expected date of the retreat, i actually
started praying and asking God what he wanted instead of making a
decision based on current situation. I prayed God if you want to have
to retreat, you need to help provide the location and the team to work
on it. And i don’t even know who’s gonna come on such short notice. And
God if you want it, i will do it and i will walk by faith.

Within like a few hours, God provided the location even though it was a
Saturday and most people don’t work on Saturday and i couldn’t confirm
a location in time to tell the youths about the retreat on Sunday. But
God miraculously provided us  the best location – bungalow with
bbq pits and private pool! After that, almost everyone whom we asked to
be on retreat comm agreed willingly (haha, most at least… ) That
was really the confirmation i needed to continue running…

That was the start to many good things that happened during the retreat.

God is so good. His purposes must prevail above ours. If he calls us,
he will provide. Once again, i was reminded, never plan according to
what i see and what i have in terms of resources but ask God what he
wants and run because he will provide the manna. MY GOD CAN PROVIDE!
Hallelujah! Praise Him!

Today has been such a strange day. I woke up not really feeling like
wanting to go through the rest of the day, just wanted to sleep. It was
raining.

But when i got up and decided that i’ll stick to what i
planned to do, things just got going and i got so much accomplished
just by being disciplined. That actually relieved a lot of the stress.
Most of the time i just procrastinate. Anyways, i got prepared to go to
church and meet the youths to plan for retreat. Sat down prayed for a
song and the song came. Sometimes God is just waiting for me to settle
down and just ask.

I’m learning to balance between waiting upon God and keeping to what he has
already put on my heart and running with discipline yet depending on
His grace. It’s such a fine balance that only God in His grace can help
us to do so. Sometimes i’m like waiting for God to do something when
he’s already given me the power to do so coz i’m too scared to do it. Sometimes i’m running ahead
and just doing what i wanna do when He didn’t say so.

I think paradise is found in the balance in the grace of the Lord. I think i caught a glimpse of that today.

Now i’m just enjoying Corrinne may and having dinner cooked by my loving husband… that too is paradise.

Thank you Lord

Today commemorates my 3rd year in full time service to my God.

Looking back – What a journey its been!!! Although this journey of
faith brought into my life many unfamiliar people, environments and
situations, yet constantly being challenged saw me growing waaay beyond myself both inward and outwardly.

In some areas of growth, although
slow, im constantly making progress. Its like a steady uphill climb (much
like how Gmail adds to our storage space
every second! – 2188.932879 megabytes at 439pm) In many other areas, its just like bang-bang-super-spontaneous – must say i prefer these moments better =)

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